Sunday, April 18, 2010

SMACKDOWN REPORT 4/16

We are live on tape from London, England and your announcers are Todd ‘Tardis’ Grisham and Matt ‘Boli Stoli’ Striker.
We begin with Chris Jericho making his way to the ring to address the people of London. Chris says that he is going to say it slowly and simply so the slovenly parasites can understand him. Randy Orton is on Raw, but at Extreme Rules, he will be facing Jack Swagger for the World Title that should be defended on Smackdown. Chris says that he was the man who made the World Title the greatest title. Jack Swagger cashed in his Money in the Bank to win the title so he deserves a rematch. He says that he is not getting one because Teddy Long is the most incompetent buffoon ever. Teddy needs to turn in his resignation immediately and he needs to ensure that he faces the winner of Swagger/Orton at Extreme Rules. Jericho says that he has been treated unfairly.
Edge interrupts Jericho and comes to the ring. Edge tells Chris that it is strange that he agrees with some of the things that Jericho says. The title deserves to be on Smackdown and he deserves a rematch, but he also deserves a swift kick to the canvas. He tells Chris that he is not the person to save the title for Smackdown. Edge asks Chris how many times has he speared him over the last month and how many times has he stood over Jericho wondering if his ribs were broken. Edge says that Jericho cannot beat Orton or Swagger.
Jericho asks Edge if he can do it and Edge says that he can beat them. Edge also tells Jericho that he can spear Chris right now if he wants.
Teddy Long brings his incompetent self out to address Chris and Edge. Teddy says that he does not appreciate the hate from Jericho. Chris tells Teddy if he did his job, he wouldn’t be hating on him. Chris demands what he deserves. Teddy says that if he was going to give Jericho what he deserves, he would have security kick him out of the building. Teddy says that Chris has a rematch clause but Teddy says that he is the one to decide when he gets it. Teddy says that Chris will get his rematch tonight.
Chris has changed his tone and says that Teddy has done the right thing. Jericho says that he will beat Swagger tonight and then he will beat Orton at Extreme Rules. Jericho says that since he beat Edge at Wrestlemania, he will never get a title match.
Teddy says that just because Jericho wears a fancy suit does not mean that he gets to call the shots. Teddy says that he believes Edge when he says that he can keep the title on Smackdown. Teddy says that Jack Swagger will defend the title tonight against Chris Jericho . . . and Edge in a Triple Threat Match.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Drew McIntyre says that the people of London don’t like him. He wonders if it is because he is young, handsome, and the Intercontinental Champion. Maybe it is because he is the ‘chosen one’. Drew says that the people don’t like him, but he doesn’t like them either.
Match Number One: Drew McIntyre versus Kane
Kane misses a punch and Drew with kicks and punches. Drew with punches but Kane punches back and then he biels McIntyre across the ring. Kane with a side head lock take down. Kane with a shoulder tackle and near fall. Kane with a side head lock and snap mare. Kane with a drop kick to McIntyre and then he gets another near fall. Kane with an Irish whip and he misses a charge into the corner and Drew with a running boot to the head. Drew with a neck breaker to the knee and Drew gets a near fall. Drew punches Kane and kicks him in the corner. Drew with a clothesline in the corner but Drew runs into a boot and Kane with a running clothesline into the corner and then he hits a side slam and gets a near fall. Kane goes up top for the clothesline and hits it. Kane sets for the choke slam but Drew sees it coming and Drew goes to the floor. Drew heads to the back but before he can get there, Matt Hardy returns Drew to the ring and the referee calls for the bell.
Winner: Drew McIntyre by disqualification
After the match, Kane hits a choke slam but it does not matter. Kane gives Hardy a choke slam while Hardy stands over Drew.
Jack Swagger enters Teddy’s office and he wants to know who Teddy thinks he is. Swagger says that this is the most unfair ruling he has ever made. Teddy says that he is the general manager of Smackdown and as long as he is the champion, Jack will have to deal with his rulings.
We go to commercial.
We are back and we see footage of Dolph Ziggler putting Josh Mathews to sleep last week on Smackdown.
Dolph says that Teddy Long has demanded that he publicly apologize for abusing an announcer. Dolph says that from the bottom of his heart and depths of his soul, blah blah blah, he humbly and sincerely apologizes to Josh Mathews.
Truth tells Ziggler that he has no heart, no soul, he has never been sincere or humble in his life. He says that Ziggler did not mean what he said and Ziggler will learn that the Truth hurts.
Match Number Two: Dolph Ziggler versus R Truth
Ziggler with a punch and forearms followed by a kick. Ziggler with an inverted suplex for a near fall. Ziggler with a reverse chin lock but Truth with an arm drag and clotheslines. Truth floats over and then does the split followed by a leg lariat and then he hip tosses Ziggler. Truth wants to know what’s up while Ziggler stays down. Truth misses the Lie Detector when Ziggler ducks out of the way. Ziggler with the sleeper and Truth goes down. Ziggler adds a body scissors and Truth passes out.
Winner: Dolph Ziggler
We go to commercial.
We are back and did you know that a lot of Diva photos are seen on WWE.com.
Match Number Three: Mickie James versus Michelle McCool with Layla and Vickie Guerrero
They lock up and Michelle with a take down and she does push ups. Mickie does push ups in Michelle’s face and then hits a drop kick and then gets a near fall with a rollup. Mickie with a jackknife cover for another near fall. Michelle with a kick but Mickie with an elbow. Mickie tries for a tornado DDT but Michelle sends Mickie to the apron and then sends Mickie into the ring post. Michelle pulls Mickie back into the ring and she sends Mickie to the mat and slams her head in the mat and gets a near fall. Michelle with a figure four head scissors and then she turns Mickie over and drives her head into the mat. Michelle uses the ropes for extra leverage but the referee sees it. Mickie with forearms but Michelle with knees to the head. Michelle with a running knee lift to the head. Mickie with a kick and forearm. Mickie with a head scissors and clothesline followed by a flying forearm. Michelle goes to the floor and Mickie follows after her and sends Michelle into the ringside barrier. Mickie climbs onto the barrier and she hits a Thesz Press onto Michelle. She gives one to Layla as well. They return to the ring and Mickie with a neck breaker for a near fall, but Layla gets on the ropes to distract the referee. Mickie kicks Layla. Michelle hits Mickie with a kick to the back of the head for the three count.
Winner: Michelle McCool
After the match, Michelle slams Mickie’s head into the mat. Mickie pushes Michelle and Beth grabs Michelle but Layla pulls Michelle out of the ring. Layla and Michelle go over the announce table and Beth follows after them. Michelle and Layla go into the crowd.
We go to commercial.
We are back and Todd and Matt talk about the draft which is coming up in less than two weeks.
We take a look back at Jack Swagger’s World Title victory over Chris Jericho. Swagger will face Edge and Chris Jericho tonight.
Luke Gallows tells Darren Young not to let his victory get to his head because if he gets another chance, he will beat Darren and shave his head personally. Darren asks Luke what it is like to lose to an NXT rookie. Punk tells them to be quiet. He tells Gallows that he fights for him when he tells him, and he tells Young that he is on thin ice. Punk tells them that they are going to show that Straight Edge means that they are better than you.
The Miz joins Matt and Todd at the announce table to scout his potential opponents and to allow Todd to bring up that he beat David Hart Smith in his daddy’s home town. Miz reminds us that on Raw, Bret Hart has to admit that The Shiz is the greatest tag team in the history of the WWE.
Match Number Four: CM Punk, Luke Gallows, and Darren Young with Serena versus Rey Mysterio, Tyson Kidd, and David Hart Smith with Natalya
Smith and Punk start things off but Punk tags Luke in before anything happens. Luke with a kick and punches followed by an uppercut. Gallows with an Irish whip and splash into the corner. Gallows with a knee and then Smith blocks a shot into the turnbuckles and Smith with an Irish whip. He runs into a knee but Smith with a power slam for a near fall. Smith with an elbow to the head and Rey and Kidd come in and Smith with a drop toe hold to Gallows and Rey and Kidd with a double drop kick to the head. Punk tags in. They lock up and Kidd works on the arm and takes Punk to the mat with a wrist lock. Punk with a leg sweep and a cover but he gets up before the referee can make a count. They lock up in a Greco Roman knuckle lock but Punk with a kick followed by a snap mare and kick to the back for a near fall. Kidd blocks a hip toss and hits one of his own. Smith tags in and kicks Punk. Rey is tagged in and Rey with a springboard splash while Smith and Kidd have Punk up for a double suplex. Rey with kicks to Punk in the corner but Punk sends Rey into the turnbuckles. Punk with forearms and kicks as Rey falls into the corner. Punk with kicks to the head and then he stands on Rey in the corner. Rey goes to the apron but in front o the ring post. Punk with a baseball slide and Rey goes into the ring post. Punk gets a near fall and then he puts Rey in an arm bar. Rey punches Punk but Punk with a rake of the eyes. Rey with a bulldog out of a wheelbarrow and then Rey with a drop kick to the knees and Punk falls into the ropes but Punk goes to the floor before Rey can hit the 619. We go to commercial.
We are back and Young backs Rey into the corner but Rey with kicks to Young’s leg. Rey with a forearm to Young. Smith tags in and he punches Young and kicks him in the corner. Kidd tags in and they hit a double shoulder tackle and Kidd gets a near fall. Kidd with a front face lock into an arm bar. Gallows tags in and he punches Kidd. Gallows throws Kidd over the to rope but Kidd lands on the apron. Kidd with a kick but he tries for a springboard move and Gallows kicks Kidd. Kidd goes to the floor but he sends Kidd back in. Gallows with an elbow drop for a near fall. Young tags in and Gallows is in a bit of shock. Young with a neck breaker for a near fall. Young sends Kidd into the turnbuckles and tags in Punk.
Punk with kicks to Kidd and he gets a near fall. Punk with a back breaker to Kidd and he gets another near fall. Punk with a figure four head scissors to Kidd. Kidd is able to counter with a bridge while Punk maintains the hold. Punk with a slam and he tags in Young. Young goes to the turnbuckles but he misses a leg drop. Punk tags in and he kicks Rey off the apron. Kidd with a leaping spin kick and then he tags in Smith. Smith with a clothesline and flying shoulder tackle. Smith with another clothesline. Smith kicks Young off the apron. Punk with a rollup but Smith rolls through and gets a near fall of his own. Kidd with a senton onto Gallows from the apron. In the ring, Punk with a kick to Smith but he can only get a near fall. Punk with knees followed but he is given a drop toe hold into the turnbuckles. Rey with a 619 using the ring post and then Smith with a running power slam for the three count.
Winners: Rey Mysterio, Tyson Kidd, and David Hart Smith
Chris Jericho is in the dressing room with Wade Barrett and he says that some day Wade will get the chance that he is getting tonight. He tells Wade to take advantage of the situation. Chris talks about how he is going to win his seventh title tonight. Wade says that he is in awe of Chris and Chris tells Wade that he should be.
We go to commercial.
Match Number Five: Caylen Croft with Trent Barreta versus JTG
They lock up while Shad makes his way to the ring. Croft kicks JTG and then hits a back elbow for a near fall. JTG with a punch but Croft with an elbow. Croft with a modified side Russian leg sweep for a near fall. Croft with an elbow and he gets a near fall. JTG punches Croft but Croft with a belly-to-back suplex for a near fall. JTG with an inside cradle for a near fall but Croft with knee drops to the back of the head and Croft gets a near fall. Croft with a reverse chin lock while we continue to see Shad walking around the ring. JTG with a sliding uppercut followed by a swinging neck breaker. JTG with a flip shoulder tackle and flying back elbow. JTG tries for the X Factor out of the corner but Croft with a running neck breaker for a near fall. JTG with a kick to Croft followed by the flying wraparound clothesline for the three count.
Winner: JTG
After the match, Shad enters the ring and hits a clothesline on JTG. Shad picks up JTG and punches him and tells JTG that he ain’t nothing without him. Shad picks JTG up again and then he misses a splash into the corner. JTG hits the X Factor in the corner and then hits a drop kick and Shad leaves the ring and goes to the back.
Edge is in the hallway with Josh Mathews. Edge says that he relates to Swagger because of the way that Swagger took advantage of the situation to cash in the briefcase. He says that Swagger is in a bad position because he can lose the title without being pinned. Edge says that he is in a good position because he can pin either man to walk out of the ring with the title.
We go to commercial.
We are back with the Raw Rebound from Monday’s main event.
We run through the top matches for Extreme Rules.
Match Number Six: Jack Swagger versus Edge versus Chris Jericho for the World Title
The bell rings and Jericho goes after Edge and Swagger joins in. Jericho watches Swagger punch Edge and Jericho with a rollup for a near fall. Swagger with a belly-to-belly suplex and Jericho goes to the floor. Edge with an Irish whip to Swagger and Edge with a methodical walk across the ring. Swagger with a forearm to Edge and then he punches him. Edge throws Swagger over the top rope to the floor and Jericho attacks Edge from behind. Jericho punches Edge and then Jericho chokes Edge in the ropes. Jericho misses the splash into the ropes and he hits the ropes when Edge moves. Edge punches Jericho and connects with forearms. Swagger trips Edge and Jericho with an elbow drop. Jericho catapults Edge’s throat into the rope and then Swagger chokes Edge. Swagger with a belly-to-belly suplex to Edge and then Jericho is sent to the floor by Edge and then Swagger charges at Edge and Edge ducks down sending Swagger to the floor. Edge with a baseball slide to Swagger and Jericho as all three men go to the floor. Edge Irish whips Jericho into the ringside barrier. Edge kicks Swagger on the floor and then he sends Swagger into the ringside barrier. Edge rolls Swagger back into the ring and Jericho punches Edge on the apron. Jericho kicks Edge on the floor but Swagger punches Jericho on the apron and then Swagger tries to suplex Jericho to the floor. Jericho tries to suplex Swagger to the floor. Edge pulls Jericho off the apron and Swagger is dropped across the top rope as we go to commercial.
We are back and Edge misses a charge into the corner and he hits the ring post. Swagger gets a near fall on Edge. Swagger works on the arm and he puts Edge in an arm bar. Swagger adds more pressure to the arm. Edge with punches to get out of the arm bar. Swagger misses a few clotheslines but he catches Edge and hits a back breaker for a near fall. Swagger turns his attention to Jericho who tries to get back into the ring but Swagger punches Jericho off the apron. Swagger hits the double jump Vader Splash on Edge for a near fall. Swagger punches Edge in the ribs and back as Edge goes to the floor. Swagger goes to the floor and Edge slams Swagger’s head into the announce table. Jericho with a running forearm to Edge on the floor. Jericho sends Edge back into the ring and he kicks Edge in the ribs followed by a belly-to-back suplex for a near fall. Jericho with a reverse chin lock. Edge punches Jericho but Jericho with a knee. Jericho misses a splash into the corner. Swagger tries for the Oklahoma Stampede but Edge gets out of the corner. Edge goes to the turnbuckles and hits a double clothesline followed by punches to Swagger and Jericho. Edge then hits big boots on both men. Edge knocks Swagger off the apron onto the announce table and Jericho gets a rollup for a near fall. Jericho with a back elbow and then Jericho lands on his feet on a Lionsault.
Edge with the Edge-o-Matic and he gets a near fall. Jericho gets a boot up for a charging Edge. Edge sends Jericho into the turnbuckles on a bulldog attempt. Edge sets for the SPEAR but Jericho with a rollup into the Walls of Jericho. Edge is about to tap but he tries to get to the ropes. Jericho pulls Edge into the center of the ring. Jericho sees Swagger coming and Jericho puts Swagger in the Walls of Jericho. Edge with an Impaler DDT on Jericho and Swagger with a kick to Edge and he tries for the Doctor Bomb. Edge blocks it and hits an Impaler DDT on Swagger. Edge sets for the SPEAR but Jericho from out of nowhere takes Edge down and gets a near fall. Swagger with an Oklahoma Roll on Jericho for a near fall. Jericho hits a Codebreaker and Swagger goes to the floor. Jericho gets to his feet and he waits for Edge to get up for a SPEAR of his own. Jericho mocks Edge and Edge with a leap frog and Edge with a SPEAR but Swagger pulls Edge out of the ring and into the ringside barrier. Swagger gets the three count on Jericho.
Winner: Jack Swagger
After the match, Swagger rolls Edge into the ring and he hits the Doctor Bomb on Edge. Swagger picks up his title belt and holds it up. Swagger leaves the ring and goes to the back.
Jericho returns to the ring and he stomps on Edge’s surgically repaired ankle. Edge puts the ankle behind the ring steps and then he kicks the steps into the ankle. Edge writhes in pain while Jericho has a smile on his face for the first time since he lost the title to Swagger.
We go to credits.

UPDATED CARD FOR EXTREME RULES 2010

Last Man Standing Match for the WWE Title
Batista vs. John Cena
Extreme Rules Match for the World Heavyweight Title
Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger
CM Punk’s Hair on the Line
Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk
Street Fight
Sheamus vs. Triple H
Steel Cage Match
Edge vs. Chris Jericho