Tuesday, March 2, 2010

RAW AS ON MAR 1

Tonight’s WWE RAW kicks off with the pyro going off and Michael Cole welcoming us to RAW from the Ford Center in Oklahoma City. They hype Bret Hart’s appearance tonight and the match between Ted DiBiase and Randy Orton tonight. We go to the ring where Shawn Michaels makes his way out.

Shawn says that Triple H, his friend of all people, doesn’t believe in him. Triple H interrupts and says he doesn’t think Shawn can win, he knows he can. Triple H says Shawn is the best he’s ever been in the ring with. HHH says Shawn has no peers in the locker room because he’s in a class all by himself. Triple H says Shawn truly is Mr. WrestleMania. Triple H says DX will never die but it’s going to be a long time before the fans see them together in the ring again.

The music hits and out comes Triple H to a nice pop. He and Shawn look at each other as Triple H makes his way down the ramp.

Shawn says that Triple H, his friend of all people, doesn’t believe in him. Triple H interrupts and says he doesn’t think Shawn can win, he knows he can. Triple H says Shawn is the best he’s ever been in the ring with. HHH says Shawn has no peers in the locker room because he’s in a class all by himself. Triple H says Shawn truly is Mr. WrestleMania. Triple H says DX will never die but it’s going to be a long time before the fans see them together in the ring again.

Triple H says he doesn’t want the last image of DX to be them losing the tag belts to Big Show & The Miz so he’s invoked their rematch clause and the match will happen tonight. Shawn says he appreciates everything but they’re going down separate paths… Triple H cuts him off again. Triple H puts over Shawn and says he believes in him. Shawn thinks about it and says they have some tag team titles to win tonight. The DX music hits and they celebrate with the fans.

- We backstage with Cheech and Chong, tonight’s hosts. In comes The Bella Twins. They ask Cheech and Chong if they can get passes to the current comedy tour. They say they’re not like the characters they portray, they’re normal guys. Cheech walks off with The Bellas while Chong sits down to rest, he says. Hornswoggle comes over with a box of Lucky Charms and shares them with Chong. Chong starts eating the cereal and the camera starts spinning with some funky music playing. First drug reference of the night. We get ready for a commercial.

- Back from the break and we get a replay from last week’s RAW where Randy Orton RKO’d Ted DiBiase.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase

We go to the ring where Randy Orton makes his way out first for the next match. Out next comes Ted DiBiase, who stares Orton down as he heads to the ring.

The bell rings and DiBiase strikes first with a kick and punches. Orton turns it around in the corner with punches of his own. Ted kicks Orton in the head but Orton clotheslines Ted to the mat. They lock up again and go to the corner. Ted with a knee and shoulder thrusts in the corner. More kicks and rights in the corner. Ted takes Orton to the top but Orton fights back and knocks him to the mat. Ted responds with a dropkick in the corner. Ted tosses Orton to the floor and goes out after him.

Orton counters a move and throws Ted into the ring post, taking control of the match. Orton rolls back in the ring and Ted looks on as we go to commercial.

Back from the break and Ted is working over Orton in the ring. Ted stomps and drops knees on Orton. Ted takes it to the corner and beats Orton down. Ted drops Orton again and gets a 2 count. Ted applies a modified sleeper now. Ted hits a big clothesline on Orton for another 2 count. Ted and Orton trade right hands now until Ted takes control. Orton catches Ted off the ropes and hits a big powerslam. Orton starts stomping on Ted now.

Orton stalks Ted from the mat now. Cody Rhodes comes down to the apron. Orton swings at him but misses. Ted comes from behind and rolls Orton up for a 2 count. Orton rolls Ted right back for a 2 count as Cody Rhodes enters the ring. Orton starts brawling with Cody as the bell is rang. Ted and Cody beat Orton down. Orton fights back eventually and drops Cody, then dropkicks Ted out of the ring. Orton hits the backbreaker on Cody. He goes for the second rope DDT but Ted pulls Cody to the floor. Ted and Cody head up the ramp together as Orton’s music plays and he looks on. Time for another break.

- Back from the break and we see a limousine pull up. Bret Hart gets out with his leg in a cast and he’s using one crutch.

- We go back inside where it’s hazy in the dressing room where Chong is with Eve Torres. The music is playing and the camera is spinning. Chong is rubbing Eve’s hair. Cheech walks in and says Chong can’t be eating cereal with sugar. Chong asks why is he rubbing William Regal’s hair. The camera stops spinning and it’s William Regal, not Eve. They do something where Chris Masters appears to be Kelly Kelly or something. Hornswoggle appears again and gives Cheech some Lucky Charms. Cheech eats some and they all begin a “sugar trip” again.

- We go to a video package showing John Cena losing the WWE Title to Batista and the recent events between the two, setting up their WrestleMania match.

Lawler teases a confrontation between Cena and Batista tonight as we go to commercial.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Jack Swagger vs. Santino Marella

Back from the break and we see a replay of Christian vs. Carlito for a spot in Money in the Bank from last week’s show. We see the briefcase hanging above the ring as the WrestleMania theme plays. Out first comes Jack Swagger, who gets a decent pop from the Oklahoma home crowd. Out next is his opponent, Santino Marella. The bell rings and they lock up. Santino strikes first and works Swagger over. Swagger hits a big knee to the gut and the gutwrench powerbomb to win the squash match and earn a spot at WrestleMania.

Winner: Jack Swagger

- We go backstage where security is waiting outside Batista’s dressing room. Out comes the WWE Champion and he’s headed to the ring with security in tow. We go to commercial.

- Back from commercial and John Cena’s music hits. He comes out to a big pop from the crowd. Once he gets in the ring, it’s a bit of a mixed reaction. Cena takes the mic and says people told him Batista stole the WWE Title from him. Cena says he has had some time to think about it and realizes it was business between Vince McMahon and Batista. Cena talks about going to WrestleMania. He says after what happened last week, he needs to pay Batista back. Cena calls Batista out. Batista’s music hits and out comes security first before the WWE Champion makes his way out and holds the belt high. Cena mocks Batista for having security.

Batista says security is there to make sure he doesn’t beat Cena up again. Cena calls Batista down to the ring and calls him a big pansy. Batista mocks Cena and calls him a funny guy. Batista says he did what he did last week because he wants to face Cena at WrestleMania. Batista says he and Cena are the two biggest stars since the Attitude era but for some reason WWE has decided to label John Cena as the man. Batista mocks Cena for being the face of WWE.

Batista says Cena can’t beat him and deep down inside, Cena knows that. Batista drops the mic and turns his back as Cena just looks on from the ring and the crowd boo’s. Batista’s music hits as he holds the WWE Title up and stares down at Cena, who looks disappointed in himself after the promo. Cole and Lawler hype tonight’s main event as we go to commercial.

- Back from commercial and Cheech and Chong are still eating Lucky Charms, having a good time. They’ve got Chavo Guerrero, Primo and Carlito dressed up in sombreros and mustaches. Yoshi Tatsu and Katie Lea are also dressed up. In walks what appears to be a chicken in a cage and it’s talking, but with Santino’s voice. Far out man, they say. They say a Divas Pillowfight match is coming up.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Zack Ryder vs. MVP

We go to the ring for our next match as the briefcase hangs above the ring. In the ring is Zack Ryder from ECW and out comes his opponent, MVP.

- We see Eve, Kelly Kelly and Gail Kim in their pajamas headed to the ring for a pajama pillowfight. Back to commercial.

- Back from commercial and Justin Roberts introduces tonight’s guest hosts, Cheech and Chong. They come down to the ring as Lowrider plays. They kick off the Divas pillow pajama fight.

Kelly Kelly, Gail Kim and Eve vs. Maryse, Jillian Hall and Alicia Fox

Out come Eve, Gail and Kelly Kelly in their pajamas with pillows. Out next comes the WWE Divas Champion Maryse with Alicia Fox and Jillian in their pajamas also. Maryse poses and the other Divas hit her with pillows. The Divas start brawling with pillows until Jillian starts clotheslining them. Kelly lays Jillian out and gets a 2 count. Maryse pins Kelly but only gets 2. Gail and Eve double team Maryse until Alicia clotheslines both of them. Alicia starts hitting on Gail until Gail lays her out with a finisher. Gail gets dumped to the floor as Cheech and Chong look on. Eve hits a new finisher on Alicia for the pinfall and the win.

Winners: Eve, Gail Kim and Kelly Kelly

- After the match, out comes Hornswoggle from under the ring. He passes out boxes of Lucky Charms. Hornswoggle, Cheech and Chong start throwing out Lucky Charms to everyone.

- We go to a Hall of Fame video package, announcing Mad Dog Vachon as the next inductee into the 2010 class. We see a video package of Vachon’s career. It’s announced that Pat Patterson will induct Vachon.

Back from a break and Justin Roberts goes to introduce Bret Hart when Vince McMahon’s music interrupts him. Out comes Vince to the ring. Vince says he wants the honor of introducing Bret and puts him over. Out comes Bret using the one crutch. We get a video package showing what’s happened with Bret over the last few weeks.

Vince asks Bret to make it known that Vince had nothing to do with the crash two weeks ago. Bret says he isn’t sure about that, but he does know Vince has treated him like a piece of trash since he returned. Bret says if Vince is sincere, he will get the hell out of the ring and let him have his farewell. Vince goes to leave but has one more thing to say. He says Bret was right about him being a liar, but he’s a World Champion Liar. Vince says he lied, he didn’t invite Bret here tonight for a farewell. Bret asks why did Vince invite him here. Vince says he screwed Bret again and it feels good.

Vince reminds Bret that Bret challenged him to a WrestleMania match. Bret says Vince can see that he’s a little incapacitated right now. Vince says Bret can heal in 6 weeks, 2 weeks since the accident and 4 more weeks until WrestleMania. Vince says Bret came back to WWE because it’s been eating at him every day for years. Vince says Bret has wanted to fight him for years. Bret says that’s right. Vince taunts Bret about fighting. Vince starts ripping on Bret, even bringing up WCW and lying about Stu Hart being in the Hall of Fame this year. Vince tells Bret to at least do it for his fans who want to see Bret in the ring one more time.

Vince asks the fans if they want to see Bret face him at WrestleMania and they pop. Bret says he can’t wrestle, he has a broken leg and calls Vince an idiot. Vince says Bret’s last name used to stand for something, but now he’s got no “Hart.” Vince says Bret is letting everyone down and calls him a coward. Vince kicks Bret’s crutch out from under him and he goes down. Vince loses his shoe somehow. Vince keeps calling Bret a coward and taunts him from outside the ring. Bret says if Vince wants the WrestleMania match, he’s got it. Bret accepts as his music plays. Vince stops on the ramp and says to show what kind of shape he’s in these days, he’s going to wrestle on RAW next week. It will be Vince McMahon vs. John Cena next week.

- We see The Miz and Big Show headed to the ring for the main event. Back to commercial.

WWE Unified Tag Team Title Match: DX vs. The Miz and Big Show

Both teams make their entrance before we go to commercial. Back from the break and Show is going at it with Michaels. Miz comes in and works over Shawn. Big Show tags back in for some double teaming. Show applies a big bearhug on Shawn.

HBK fights off with chops and goes for a superkick but Show catches it. Triple H is tagged in and he goes at it with Show. Big knee to the jaw by Triple H and a spinebuster on Show. Miz comes in and gets hit with a spinebuster also. HHH turns around to a chokeslam from Show. Show turns around to Sweet Chin Music from HBK. Both Triple H and Big Show are down now.

Miz and HBK tag in at the same time and go at it. HBK with a forearm, atomic drop and chops. HBK slams Miz down and goes to the top rope for the big elbow drop. HBK hits it and gets ready for Sweet Chin Music. The Undertaker appears on the big screen and interrupts Shawn. They stare at each other, distracting Shawn. HBK turns around and tries for Sweet Chin Music on Miz but Miz rolls him up for the win.

Winners: Big Show and The Miz

- After the match, HBK sits on the mat and looks down, disappointed. Triple H walks over to talk and Shawn pushes him off, saying don’t touch me. Shawn heads up the ramp. In the ring, Sheamus comes from the crowd and clotheslines Triple H. Sheamus lays Triple H out and throws him over to the floor. Sheamus hits the kick to the h ead, into the announcers table and stands over Triple H. The crowd tells Sheamus he sucks. Triple H tries to get up but Sheamus kicks him in the head again. Triple H goes over the announcers table and back to the floor. Sheamus stands on top of the table and raises his hands. Sheamus stares down at Triple H as his music plays and we go to replays. RAW goes off the air with Sheamus still standing over Triple H as the referees check on him.

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